I didn't even want a new cell phone. I like the one I have, although I don't use it more than five times a year. I only got it as a means of contact with my daughter in case of cottage travel emergencies.
Anyway, the first recall message I received was by telephone from a friendly man named Don who suggested I ask for a Samsung M510. Not knowing much about the particulars, I had no idea what that meant, although his tone suggested that a Samsung M510 could mean a phone of many features. In the meantime, I contacted my daughter (whose own LG 150 had been accidentally laundered at home and was a little bit warped) of the recall. She went over to her nearest Virgin Mobile kiosk, where she was instantly handed an LG Muziq, a phone clearly worth a lot more than the LG 150 (and more apt to work than one full of suds).
By the time I got to the same kiosk about three days later, their replacement phones were all gone, but the young man assured me that I should write in for an LG 160, as they were indeed the superior phone. (I might not be young, or sexy and savvy, but Buster, I'm not dead yet.) I thanked him, and opted to wait until I was back in Toronto to take up this matter again.
When I got home, I decided to call one of their toll free numbers because I was confused by the mixed messages I was receiving by phone and in person and from the various web sites. While it was almost sort of fairly practically somewhat clear that "Health Canada is of the opinion, based on the review of test results and its assessment of current science, that the past and current use of the LG 150 should not pose immediate or long-term health concerns" the words "should not" made me feel a little bit nervous. Should is a modal and, while remarkably friendly, does not touch the meaning of will.
I also noted the difference between the LG web site message and the one put out by Virgin Mobile:
Please note, however, that because customer satisfaction and safety continue to be our primary commitment, we are taking a proactive approach and working in cooperation with our carriers to allow all LG 150 phones to be returned. http://ca.lge.com/lg150/
versus:
"Needless to say, we're doing everything we can to ensure our customers are all aware of LG's voluntary recall and of the simple way to get a replacement phone, at no cost," said Andrew Black, President and CEO, Virgin Mobile Canada. "Customer experience is our number one priority and we are very focused on getting our customers their new phones as quickly as possible."
http://www.virginmobile.ca/vmc/en/whyChooseUs/wc_012709.html
So I called the toll free number to try and ascertain the upper edge of the fine line. The young man with whom I spoke told me, to the best of my memory, that while the recall was voluntary, everyone should (there's that word again, this time used in an entirely different context) turn their phones in; that they were a risk and wouldn't have been recalled otherwise. So then I was left wondering -- and given this cynical age, who could fault me? -- why anyone would offer a free phone if they didn't have to?
So off I went to another kiosk, this one in Toronto. The young woman advised me that there was nothing really wrong with the phones; that they simply didn't meet Radio standards (whatever that means); that her mother had the LG 150 and that she wasn't trading hers in and that, if I wanted a new one, I'd have to hand over my LG 150 then and there and wait until the mail offered up a new one.
So then I called Virgin Mobile to complain and ask them to clarify. Ultimately, a friendly woman took my call, and we discussed the ramifications of all of these mixed messages. She was able to semi-satisfy me by telling me that the only replacement for the LG 150 is (not ought to have been or should be) the LG 160 -- $29.99 at Best Buy -- I have to ask, who could blame anyone for being disgruntled knowing they were going to get a basic phone versus an LG Muziq (harumph!) -- $149.97 at Best Buy? She did not, however, satisfy me in terms of the health issues. She told me that it wasn't up to Virgin Mobile to make that decision for their customers, which kind of begs another question: why the recall? And if it isn't up to Virgin Mobile to take a stand on the health issue aspect, then why did one of their phone operators tell me I ought to switch phones?
In the end, I didn't get a new phone. Despite their promise of a trade-off of same or equal value, I paid more at Best Buy than $29.99 for the LG 150, and a new phone, as I said, is not what I wanted. Oh no. Instead I got a lot more -- so much, in fact, that the next time I'm shopping around, it likely won't be with Virgin Mobile or for a product made by LG. If people can't come together and get their stories, radio waves, standards, recalls, replacements, or values straight, then I don't want their products. In the meantime, let's hope my head doesn't swell up like a melon or my teeth fall out. That wouldn't be pleasant for anyone.
Mr. Watson, come here, I want to see you.
Alexander Graham Bell's first telephone words.
I know how he feels.
<:^)
